What You Will Get Out of the Collaborative Process

You will get cooperation instead of opposition

Collaborative divorce is ideal for couples and families who want to make the process as civil, cooperative, and respectful as possible. If you have children, you want to have that co-parenting relationship get off to a good start. You want a process that will protect your children from being caught in the middle of two unhappy and frustrated parents. And you want to negotiate your property settlement and any support arrangements in a cooperative process that helps keep costs down and encourages solving problems, rather than creating new ones.

Participants will act with dignity and mutual respect instead of hostility

Handling conflicts with integrity, personal responsibility, and discretion is a way to model some important lifelong lessons for your children, and also allows you to emerge at the end of your divorce with a sense of self-respect and well-being. You have a circle of friends that are important to you and your children. You may also have extended family with whom you would both like to have cordial relationships after the divorce. These family connections often provide essential support for your family during this time of transition. You also want to behave reasonably and fairly during this difficult time, consistent with your true self. Choosing a Collaborative Divorce affirms these values.

You will preserve privacy instead of publicly adjudicating your dispute

In a court-based divorce process, personal matters become public record. In a Collaborative Divorce, the entire process is conducted in private. When divorce issues go to court hearings or trial, private family and financial decisions are taken out of your hands and determined by the judge – often the person who knows the least about you, your family, and your values. When you choose Collaborative Practice, you preserve your autonomy, privacy, and, you and your spouse, working together, control the outcome. Also, you will be able to work with your professional team to create a wider range of settlement options than may be offered by the court.

You will keep control of the results instead of having a result imposed on you

The Collaborative Process may be the best way to deliver the maximal financial outcome for you and security for your family. This difficult transition should not become a lifestyle, as many litigated divorces do. The Collaborative Process offers the opportunity to resolve the issues between you and your spouse rationally and efficiently. We know you are busy with family, with work and career, and with redefining your personal relationships and future goals. Collaborative practice provides a context to help you focus on what’s truly important, to move through this challenging phase of life and to re-engage in building your new life.